Over this week, I’ve been re-watching one of my favorite Sci-Fi channel (when it was still called that) shows: Farscape. Within the show, a group of misfits from the stars gallivant across the universe in a ship known as a “Leviathan.” This ship is special in that it not only has the capacity to hold a large crew and cargo, but the ship itself is alive. The concept of biologically active machines has its ground in human imagination, and today, I am going to delve a little into the kinds of biomechanical technologies that are being developed as we speak. Rodney Brooks has an abstract at the AI lab of MIT that highlights some of the specific problems as well as some of the angles from which scientists are beginning to work from in creating these new breeds of machines. In this prospectus, the author proposes three new directions from which fellow researchers can begin to look at the problem of biomechanical engineering. According to Rodney Brooks, this should be the guiding direction for those interested in the production of living machines:

1) The machines should have capabilities that robots currently do not possess but that living machines do possess. The first of these are self-regulating or homeostatic qualities such as “self-repair, self-reproduction, and energy self-sufficiency.” Obviously, machines do not possess these abilities (yet), but they would be greatly appreciated in almost any application.

2) Living machines need to learn how to self-organize and create physical attributes based on a complex environment. This means that the machines need to learn how to organize their neural and physical functions to match their purpose and environment rapidly.

3) Biomechanical researchers need to spend more time coming up with mathematical theorems and equations for the propagation of the above topics on living beings and systems in order to apply them to their robotic counterparts.

The concept of living machines would have far reaching implications on the general populace and on the way we think about technology generally. The machines would cease becoming objects and the relationship between man and machine would mutate to a symbiotic relationship between living organisms to accomplish the all-inclusive grand act of survival.

So what kind of work has been done so far on biomachinery? A lot, really, but the definition is still up for debate. There are plenty of machines that are shaped and designed after animals, but these are really more of biology-inspired machines: biomimetic engineering. To qualify as biomechanical, a living organism must be used in the manner that a machine is. Here is an example of a very simple machine that was developed for water purification by the name of Living Machines. Note that the microorganisms that are used for the purification of water were specially designed and created in a lab. A sustainable environment is created for the microorganisms and the system is essentially self-sustaining. This qualifies the same kind of drive as the definition that was offered earlier above. The machine must be capable of sustaining itself as well as completing the task for which it was designed. This is a link to the work of Eduardo Torres-Jara who is developing a protocol for a robot that “eats.” In this case, the act of eating is to find electrical current for which to power its batteries, but the act of self-regulation for the robot brings it one step closer to functioning in a homeostatic manner. Though the original design and implementation of robots that look for their own power-source has been shortcut into the aggregation of solar cells on many robots, there are a few that rely on actual chemical breakdown of food. This link shows the “Chew-Chew” train which is made up of many blocks of living fuel cells that are microbacteria. The bacteria is fed sugar-cubes and the sugar-cubes are broken down and used as energy just as a living organism uses them. Another piece to add to this developing technology is the work of Dr. Ben Whalley from the University of Reading. He has built the world’s first cyborg; the machine (if it can still so be called) is piloted by the brain of a rat that is kept in a bell jar and transmits data via bluetooth impulses to the robot. The robot can learn (since the primary interface is the brain of a living organism) but the entire design of the “body” is robotic. Here is a video of the object at work:

So what does the future hold for biomachines? Quite a bit, truthfully. The applications are beginning to trickle down, but scientists are theorizing that certain bacteria can aid in electrical conductivity and with the application of genetic replication and the ability to engineer organisms to do practically anything, the future of biomechanical engineering seems wide open. Next week, I’ll delve a little more into the science of genetic engineering to look at obscure topics such as cloning, genetic replication, genetic mutation, and their role in the development of human civilization.

This week, I was inspired by a popular internet meme about Ray Bradbury. You know the one I mean (if not, here’s the link). Aside from being an adorable, ancient, sci-fi writer, Ray Bradbury has been among the few people able to conceive of portable computing devices. This week’s thread will have to deal with the slew of wearable, portable computers that are promising to change the way that we interact with our environment.

But before I get to some of the products that contain portable computers that are actually among us, I want to discuss one of the trends of computing that many of you may be well acquainted with. That is, the portability and multi-functionality of technology. As technology has progressed (particularly in the past twenty years) there has been a continuing trend to make computers smaller, more powerful, and multi-functional. As this trend continues, humanity will continue to develop products that seem to be able to do what we could only call fiction before. So, without further ado, here’s some of the technology that promises to revolutionize the future.

A gizmo that I’d like to bring to your attention to add weight to my preceding statement comes from a company called Qualcomm. The device has the unfortunate acronym of WMD (Wearable Mobile Device), but the list of features and the amazing versatility that this chip offers greatly compensate for the lousy acronym. Here’s a link to their literature which outlines a basic chip that can control Bluetooth and GPS functions from a processor the size of a quarter.

The implications for this are pretty far reaching, but here’s some of the gadgets that are possible with systems like these:

1) Glasses that could stream information such as GPS locations or use a Bluetooth connection to display information on the screen; here’s a company that is developing just that. The implications for this particular project are far-reaching. Eventually, the possibility of having contacts or a pair of glasses or goggles that contain information about anything you could ever want. Imagine a pair of glasses that could contain street-level maps or camera views occurring real time to check traffic while preparing to drive a car. One of the images from above shows the blown-up schematic for an engine piece that a mechanic is about to work on; that is solid thinking that can really help a lot of people in different walks of life to be more efficient.

2) Another device that is not necessarily wearable but certainly maintains the portability concept of this post is micromedia paper. The company that is offering this product (by 2015ish) is Lunar Design. Here is a review of this nifty paper. The implications for this product are that you will be able to record and deliver information on an extremely portable surface that is also in many ways quite diverse. Imagine being able to display information and videos on a piece of paper thin computer that comes complete with speakers and a replaceable battery, and the concept also includes the capacity to connect to wifi connections. Also, the projected cost of these mini-screens is well within any technophile’s budget.

3) A very neat product that will undoubtedly blur the line between human and cyborg is the Eyetap product being developed in Toronto. Here is a link to their site with an outline of the capabilities that their product promises to deliver. The idea is that your own eye is the interface that operates the function of this computer which learns to work with your own eye to process functions such as picture taking and image display.

4) These Zypad interfaces from Eurotech bring computers as sophisticated as netbooks into a portable piece of clothing worn on the forearm. Here is the link to these promising personal processors. The applications for this are incredibly far reaching when one considers that these are the preliminary models that allow for complete modern computing housed entirely on the person that is operating the system.

5) The last product that I’m going to look at for this post is still completely in the prototype stage, and it is the invisibility cloak. Here’s an article that outlines how silk could be the key to providing affordable personal invisibility. I’m not quite sure how this will be used in a positive way, but the inevitability of this product reaching consumers seems pretty assured.

Are there any wearable computers that you know about that I should have covered in this page? If so, please feel free to leave a comment on the bottom. I’ll see you next week to talk about some other products that have the potential to change an individual’s everyday life.

A few years ago I was injured while fighting a bear.  I killed the bear, but not without a price — I sprained my ankle.  Yes, I know it’s hard to believe that I could have suffered injury at the hands of so small a beast, but it is true.  I was out of “work” for a few weeks and I asked my friends and family to give me ideas for things to do while bedridden for a while (it was a very serious sprain).  One of my friends offered me his collection of a show called Smallville, maybe you’ve heard of it?  Well, as someone who loves a good comic book and an on-again, off-again fan of the man of steel, I took up this well-intentioned gift and finished (what was) the entire show in a few weeks.  I was in no way enamored or in love, but it was entertaining enough to pass the time and he gave me the whole collection at once so, there you have it.

If the power rangers were from Kansas…

Now from what I understand  the show is still on after 50 or 60 seasons now and Clark has yet to don his iconic dress and Mr. Luthor left the show — meh.  Normally I wouldn’t care enough about a megacorporation raping established cannon like this, but I heard something the other day that rattled my geeky cage; a young boy was with his mother inside of a Target, begging her for one of the seasons on DVD.  The mother denied him and he went on to say, “But I need to know if Clark and Chloe get together.”  I couldn’t help myself and butted in, “You know Lois and Clark end up together in the end, right?”  The child looked at me like I punched his mother and replied, “Maybe in the comics, but Smallville isn’t like the comics, it’s actually good!”  I then punched the child.  His mother took offense so I punched her as well.  Then I grabbed all of the Smallville DVDs, stole them, and burned them in my backyard as a sacrifice to the continuity gods.

If you didn’t know this before, I’m going to fill you in on a little secret now: Smallville is a piece of sh*t.  It’s not a piece of sh*t the way a person who sleeps with your girlfriend is a piece of sh*t, scheming and conniving.  Smallville is a piece of sh*t the way Ryan Leaf is a piece of sh*t, promising, but stingy and too self-involved.

The show started with a great idea: Bruce Wayne before he becomes Batman — Great!  Wait, huh?  That’s right Smallville was originally going to be Gotham and to be honest, I’m thankful they didn’t.  Who knows how greed-rape would’ve ruined the caped crusader for me…  Anyways, after Batman’s story got axed, Alfred Gough (Shanghai Noon, Shanghai Knights, Spider-Man 2, Herbie: Fully Loaded, and The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor) and Miles Millar (who partners with Gough on many of the previous titles, but also celebrates success with The Hannah Montana Movie) came up with the same formula for Superman — Clark in Smallville.  In and of itself a great idea!

While season one was freak-of-the-week, the following seasons have revolved around greater story arcs involving several DC characters, heroes and villains.  Okay.  Fine.  So what’s the problem?

The problem is that Smallville the TV show isn’t Smallville from the comics.  I know a lot of people defend the show saying, “Smallville is its own continuity,” but to me, that’s horse sh*t.  Why would you make a show about a younger version of the most famous superhero ever, if you’re not going to stick to the details?  It’s the details that make him great!  I can understand a few changes in the name of interpretation, but some of the stuff the CW has done is just bad (I’ll get to details in a second).

A show with this doesn’t need good writing.

And if you absolutely must change things around, do it for a good reason; if the word money comes up in the conversation, it’s not a good reason.  When I say “good” I mean “of moral fortitude,” in other words, if you’re going to have Lex Luthor live in Smallville (for much longer than he should’ve) there better be a good reason behind it.  What you’re doing at that point is changing cannon, not reinterpreting it.  A reinterpretation would be something like, changing the design of Supe’s suit, or making Lois a blonde, but creating a character named Chloe who will exist as one of the most significant characters in Clark Kent’s life is going to change his future, that’s something that’s hard for me to take.  Now, Ready for the list?

Lex don’t love dem hoes.

1.  Lex Luthor.  This guy should never have been in the show, well, at least not until Clark moved to Metropolis, or at least just for a brief stint according to cannon.  If you needed him to be in the show in order to give Clark a nemesis, than maybe a show about Superman before he was Superman wasn’t such a good idea in the first place!  What you’ve done instead is taken a series of events and moved them back in time.  That’s not really impressive…  We know Clark and Lex become enemies, I thought Smallville took place before all that.

Cute, but unnecessary, like munchkins.

2.  Chloe Sullivan.  The idea of Chloe is fine: a high-strung, headstrong reporter who will stop at nothing to “get the story.”  Are you f*cking kidding me?  I have an idea, let’s do a show about Superman before he was Superman and all we really have to do is write about superman with all the people he knows when he is superman, but make them teenagers and give them different names — SHENANIGANS!  We didn’t need Lois Lane in this show yet!  I THOUGHT IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE BEFORE ALL THAT!  This was a cheap way to create a relationship that wasn’t supposed to happen to Clark yet…  Chloe Sullivan did not exist in the comics-proper.  I understand the need for more supporting characters in Smallville, sure you can even make some up, but do they have to be copies of people we already know and love?  PS: Allison Mack is cute.

Ginger or no, let Jimmy be.

3.  Jimmy Olsen.  You killed Jimmy Olsen?!  Clark Kent isn’t even Superman yet and you killed Jimmy Olsen?  Are you f*cking kidding me?  I know, I know:  He wasn’t really Jimmy Olsen, but Jimmy Olsen’s younger brother Jimmy Olsen.  Oh, okay.  Let me bend Ms. Continuity over a bit so it hurts less when you f*ck her!

I see: Heroes. CW sees: $$

4.  Flash, Cyborg and every other mucked up ancillary character…  Cyborg was too old, (that) Flash was too young, Aquaman, well he just sucked, Oliver Queen should’ve been the same age as Superman, Papa Kent didn’t run for Senator, and Lionel Luthor didn’t exist…  You’ve destroyed the fictional reality of Superman, please leave the rest of DC alone.

Look, I’m fine with reimaginings, I think it’s neat to see what different people do with different materials.  All I’m asking for here is a bit of discretion when referring to the “greatness” of Smallville.  If you really love the Superman mythology, go support the comic community and buy a book!  Otherwise just admit that you like the Gilmore-Girl-like writing, typical WB/CW teenage angst drama, and keep your nose out of Superman all together.  You can play with Superman, just don’t f*ck with him.

Two good things to come from Smallville?  Kreuk and Durance.  Especially Durance.

Until next time,

Mr. Wolff

**UPDATE: This video is awesome.  Thanks to broken for the heads up!