Greetings all,

I was cruising around the information super highway, looking for inspiration for today’s list, when I came across this:

A screen shot from the upcoming THE GOON movie! Huzzah!  This awesome picture of The Goon and his sidekick, Frankie got me thinking about the greatest sidekicks of all time. So, today I present to you my list of the ten greatest comic book sidekicks of all time (in no particular order):

1) FRANKIE: The guy who started the list gets the first spot. Despite his small size, Frankie is famous for his “knife to the Eye” attack. This attack is usually used in tandem with the greatest catchphrase in all of comics: “Knife to the Eye!”

2) ROBIN: No matter who is Robin (there has been four of them, I believe), Batman’s sidekick gets to be on the list for sheer sake of longevity. 70 years of speedos and domino masks earns anyone a spot on this list.

3) ARTHUR: If you were tired of your life as a boring old CPA, what would you do? Go back to school? Buy a new car and have a nifty midlife crisis? Well, Arthur had the best idea ever, he found a moth costume and became the sidekick for The Tick. SPOON!

4) BUCKY: Bucky is the man. He sacrifices himself to save Captain America, and then comes back to life 60 years later, as a cyborg no less, and becomes Captain America. Top that super-assistants! (Yes, I know there was more than one Bucky, but only the first one really counts, the rest were posers.)

5) THE GOAT: Neither Quantum nor Woody were good superheroes, but their sidekick was awesome. That’s right, it’s THE GOAT! With all the powers of… A GOAT! This just goes to show, if you don’t have the cache to get a real sidekick, dress up an animal.

6) OBERON: Striking a blow for little people everywhere! Every character from Giffen and DeMatteis’ JLI run was great, but Oberon stood head and shoulders (not literally of course) above them all. The dude was a valet for gods, and went to bed with Fire (who is hot, pun intended). Way to go little guy!

7) CASSIDY: Every time Cassidy graced the pages of PREACHER, you knew something crazy was going to happen. The man is a drug-addicted Irish Vampire, how could shenanigans not be afoot when he enters?

RICK JONES: The ultimate utility sidekick. This man has been an assistant to Captain America, Captain Marvel (the first and the third), The Hulk, and even the Supreme Intelligence (well, kinda). This guy is the village doorknob of sidekicks, everyone gets a turn.

9) KID MIRACLEMAN (Young Marvelman): What separates Kid Miracleman from the dozens of other sidekicks out there? What makes him better than Toro, or Superboy, or Wondergirl? Well, he went crazy and killed the whole city of London. Top that Aqualad!

10) MIDNIGHT: If you have never heard of Midnight, you are probably wondering why he is on this list. If you HAVE heard of Midnight, you are definitely wondering how he made this list. Well, Moon Knight’s sidekick sucks. He sucked as an actual sidekick (he died), he sucked when he was brought back to life as an evil cyborg (he whined a lot), and he sucks just as much now as a crazy rusted cyborg (still whiny.) I felt the guy needs something good to happen to him. Pity vote right here.

Thanks all for stopping in, check back here tomorrow for the latest from THE UNDERGROUNDS! And if you are going to be in SF this weekend for Wondercon, keep an eye out for the Semantink crew as we will be repping up there all weekend!